The y and the t are far too close to each other on the keyboard for a company called CUNY.

I’m a skeptic.  If you tell me something without irrefutable proof, I’ll doubt it.  The planet is really getting warmer?  Really?  Not that I’ve noticed…see this guy over here says the planet is actually getting cooler.  That sounds doubtful to me as well.  I guess one of them could be true, but is it worth betting on either side?  They sound pretty far fetched to me.

I mean, I’m not a scientist. I’ve never read any of the reports “validating” climate change or “refuting” climate change, and even if I had I probably wouldn’t understand it. Without any understandable evidence, how do I decide how to act?

Pascal suggests a wager when arguing the existence of God.  Even though it cannot be proved through reason, Pascal says that people should live as though God exists. A person living as though God exists he has everything to gain and nothing to lose. If he’s wrong, no harm done: he winks out of existence; if he’s right, he’s in like Flynn.  The man living as if there is no God puts you with nothing to gain and everything to lose.  If he’s right he’ll wink out of existence just like the pious man; but if he’s wrong he will find himself faced with a very angry God.

In the same way, it makes sense to act as if our planet was in crisis. Living this way gives us everything to gain and nothing to lose. If you preserve the earth and find that the crisis was true, you’ve just saved humanity; if you find that there was no crisis, you’ve still got the planet and it’s in better shape than when you started averting the crisis that never would have happened. If you live as if there is no crisis and find that the crisis never comes, no real harm done…except the cosmetic damage done to the earth.  On the other hand if you find that there is a crisis, you’ve just destroyed the hope of mankind’s survival.

Seriously.  If the fatalists are to be believed, what is possibly at stake is the survival of humanity; how much would be too much to do to possibly save the future of our species on this planet?

What harm could come from heeding the warnings?

What harm could come from ignoring the warnings?

I’m not a scientist, so I won’t tell you that there is a global crisis, but it seems to me it’s worth believing in…

“Just a trim…nothing fancy.”

For the sake of my niece and my wife, the age of Mohawks is over.

“How do you comb it? Just forward like that?”

This is my gay hairdresser speaking.

“Yeah, I guess.  I don’t want to spend too much time on it in the morning.”

This is me realizing that perhaps I should be a bit more metrosexual.

“…but look. If you comb it back, like this…”

He sprays down my hair and slicks it back.

“…you will look almost sexy.”

I laugh.

“No just simple is fine.”

Then as I’m sitting in the chair, my thoughts stray.

“Did he say, ‘almost sexy’? Really? That’s the best I can possibly do? The best haircut he can suggest is one that makes me almost sexy? Is actually sexy really the best I can be in this world?

As if he can read my mind he keeps playing with my hair.

“Yes, you look almost sexy now.”

>sigh<

There’s the “official” pictures that were downloaded onto the computer just before it went into the shop. Until we get it back, here’s the pictures that we took on Halloween proper.

This year’s costume wasn’t quite as esoteric as last year’s Suede and Stella, but it still took people took varying amounts of clues to figure it out.

Anyone that figured it out just from the cane got five points.

(I was going to paint the cane, but figured that doing it in PhotoShop and gluing flames on would look better.)

If I caught anyone eying me as if they were trying to place me, I’d bring out the Vicodin bottle and pop a pill.

If they got it at that point, they’d get four points.

(Thanks to Lil Sis for the prop.)

If they still looked perplexed, I’d take out the dry erase marker and write a symptom on my white board (aka Peeps).

Two points for guessing it at this stage.

(Notice what she’s holding.)

Last clue was she and I playing catch with the BOUO.

(Bonus points if you called it the “Ball of Unknown Origin”.)

One point if you guessed “House” at that point, two points if you guessed “Drug Addict Doctor” (which someone actually did), because really if you know who House is you should have gotten it several clues ago.

Pictures as soon as I can!

Although we were plentiful in cherry tomatoes this year, I really wished we had apples.

A wise man said to me, “Do you know when the best time to plant an apple tree is?”

“I guess ten years ago would have been nice.”

“Correct.”  He paused.  “Do you know when the second best time to plant an apple tree is?”

I shrugged, disappointed in my lack of foresight.

He said “Right now” with a comforting smile.

At the last poker night, my home-made bruschetta was gone the men-folk needed man-food.

Pizza was ordered and then the inevitable question was asked, “Who’s chipping in?”

All I had was a five, someone else handed me a two singles which I pocketed, and then someone found a tenner to make sure we were covered.  After the pizza guy was happy, more people fished out their singles to give to the guy who dropped the ten.  In the end everyone had a slice, but we lost track of who had paid what.  There are two scenarios that could have happened.  First, everyone might have given Mr. Sawbuck three bucks. Considering the fact that each slice averaged to $2.25, everyone was overpaying by 75 cents and Mr. Sawbuck wound up pocketing the profits. He goes home eight bucks richer and gets his pizza for free. This is out current healthcare plan. We are overpaying into a pizza system rather than actually paying for a slice, allowing Mr. Sawbuck to profit without actually giving you service. Luckily in our case everyone got a slice, but in the healthcare system even after paying into it for years you can easily be denied the pizza you deserve. The next scenario is more likely knowing my friends.  I know I paid two bucks in, two people paid three, and Mr. Sawbuck paid seven.  After that I stopped keeping track, and likely no one else paid for their pizza.  This means that the four of us overpaid (some of us more than others), but pizza costs money.  We know that pizza is not free, so someone has to front the money…since I was hosting the party I was happy to do so as was Mr. Sawbuck and a couple of others.  This means that half the people in the room got to eat for free.

Some people would call them “moochers” (or in the healthcare scenario they would be called “foreigners”), but why should this bother me?

I got all the pizza I wanted, and our pizza system worked so well that a few extra people got fed along the way.  A national health-care plan massive enough to serve the United States is going to have problems.  I, for one, would rather not have a health-care system that has the huge problem of not enough people getting health-care rather have a health-care system that has the huge problem of too many people getting health-care.  People need pizza, and if I’ve got enough pizza to spare (which we would if we took all the money we paid into insurance and put it into health-care) I don’t mind moochers.   I realize that I can’t feed the who building, so I won’t leave my apartment door open with an invitation to raid my fridge…but if one or two of them sneak into my poker party and grab a slice, that’s cool with me.

Becky and I have been talking about what we wanted to d with our bodies after we die.  We understand that the living need to grieve and having a focal point of one’s emotion is often helpful for this process; in this case it would be a final resting place that helps with grieving.  On the other hand, we don’t feel the need to take up real estate after we die.  There are various versions of “green” graveyards that are considering this problem, but perhaps the  Mallory family has the best idea.  They were either very close in life or were centuries ahead of their time when considering the issue.

Who’s in with me for sharing a plot?

~~~MAP~~~
The map of New York consists of 42 NEIGHBORHOODS.

What constitutes a neighborhood in New York City is always suspect, and as such this map is divided in such a way to reflect the original Risk game. A group of adjacent neighborhoods that are one color constitute a BOROUGH. The same rules that apply to continents apply to boroughs.

TERRAIN:
Rivers are normally impassable. However, rivers can be passed at bridges, tunnels, and the Staten Island Ferry. There are enough bridges between Manhattan and the Bronx that you may also travel between Inwood/Washington-Heights, Harlem/Washington-Heights, and Harlem/Melrose even though these bridges aren’t marked on the map.

For example, an army from Secaucus can attack SoHo or Chelsea (as they are joined by tunnels) or Morningside Heights (as there is a bridge crossing the river). However, an army from Secaucus would not be able to attack The West Village or The Upper West Side, as they share no passable border.

AIRPORTS:
3 of the neighborhoods on the map have “airports” (indicated by an airplane symbol). When defending a neighborhood with an airport, the defender gets a +1 bonus to the highest defensive die roll. Airports also generate an extra troop in their neighborhood at the start of each of the owner’s turns.

STADIUMS:
2 of the neighborhoods have “stadiums” (indicated by a baseball field). If an player successfully defends the territory against an attack, it allows the defender to draw an “adventure card” at the end of their turn.  If a player successfully takes over a neighborhood, it allows the attacker to draw an “adventure card” at the end of their turn.

~~~CARDS~~~
NEIGHBORHOOD CARDS:
There is a neighborhood card for each neighborhood on the board. Each of these lists a neighborhood, and either an Pedestrian, a Bike Messenger or a Taxi Cab. There are also 2 wild cards that don’t have neighborhoods but do have pictures of the 3 units and can indicate any one of them. Neighborhood cards can be traded in for extra reinforcements as described later. Each player starts the game with 1 neighborhood card.

ADVENTURE CARDS:
There are 3 kinds of adventure cards. Each player starts with 4 random adventure cards (cannot be events).

~~Mission Cards~~
There cards contain secret missions for your mayor. When a mayor is in the neighborhood denoted on the card you are rewarded (usually with extra troops).

EXAMPLE: Central Park, Manhattan – 2 pedestrians anywhere in Manhattan (2 points).

~~Event Cards~~
These cards effect the game in many ways, and must be played immediately when drawn.

EXAMPLE: Subway Series – Play immediately – The player with more units at his neighborhood with the stadium must attack the neighborhood with a stadium that has less units.  Even though they are not adjacent, no travel is necessary.  This attack will last until there is only one unit remaining in the attacking neighborhood or until the defender has been defeated.  The defending (or conquered) neighborhood is rewarded with five units.  If both neighborhoods have the same number of units, flip a coin to decide which is the attacker.

~~Power Cards~~
After being drawn, power cards can be played at certain times for special effects.

EXAMPLE: Commuter Hell – Play at the end of your turn. Choose one bridge, tunnel, or ferry.  No travel or attacking is possible over that transit point until the beginning of your next turn. (1 point)

~~~~~~~~~
SET UP

Setting up the game is a simple process. The number of players is calculated, they choose their armies and then retrieve a number of armies from their tray. (3 players = 35 armies each, 4 players = 30 armies, 5 players = 25 armies, and six players = 20 armies)

~~~~~~~~~
REINFORCEMENTS
Neighborhood Reinforcements: Divide the number of neighborhoods you control by 3 (ignore the remainder). This is how many base reinforcements you receive, which can never be less than 3.

Borough Reinforcements: If you control an entire borough at the start of a turn, you get the borough bonus added to your reinforcement total.

Card Sets: If you have a set of 3-of-a-kind OR one-of-each unit, you can trade it in for extra reinforcements. They give reinforcements depending on what set you trade in.
3 Pedestrians: 4
3 Bike Messengers: 6
3 Taxi Cabs: 8
1 Pedestrian, 1 Bike Messenger, 1 Taxi Cab: 10
Further, if you control any of the neighborhoods listed on the cards, you may place an additional TWO units in one neighborhoods listed.  Other than these two units THESE UNITS MAY BE DISPERSED THROUGH YOUR NEIGHBORHOODS AS YOU WISH.

Airports: In addition to the previously mentioned units, place one additional unit in each airport that you control.

~~~COMBAT~~~
Same rules as Risk with a few exceptions.

MAYOR:
Each army starts out with a mayor. When a mayor is sent into battle with an army, it gives a +1 bonus to the highest dice roll of its army.

The attacker may invade from any neighborhood into any enemy neighborhood as long as they share a passable border. The attacker decides how many units they would like to commit to the attack (up to 3 at a time, but remember, one must always remain behind).

The defender will defend with the maximum number of units available unless they explicitly state otherwise.

Each side rolls one dice per unit committed. Leaders give a +1 to the highest roll of the army they are attached to, and airports give a +1 to the highest roll of an army defending the territory with the airport (thus it is possible to get a +2 on the highest roll if defending an airport with a mayor). The highest dice are compared (and then the second highest if necessary) to determine casualties. Defenders win any tie.

ELIMINATING ANOTHER PLAYER:
You get their territory cards. You do not get their adventure cards.

FORTIFYING YOUR POSITION:
At the end of your turn, you get one free move to “fortify” your position. You can move any number of your own units from one neighborhood that you control to another CONNECTED neighborhood that you control, as long as you leave one behind. Neighborhoods are connected if you control all neighborhoods along a path in between. You can move all the way across the board if you have a clear path (same rules for passable terrain that are used for invasions apply here).

END OF TURN
Collect a territory card if you conquered a territory that turn and an adventure card if you successfully defended or took control of a neighborhood with a stadium. If you draw an event card play it immediately and draw another.

If you have no mayor, you can elect to turn one of your pedestrians into your mayor by removing him from the board and replacing him with your mayor token.

END OF GAME
If a player eliminates all other players, they win the game.

Otherwise the game ends when the A-Train reaches the end of the line in Inwood.  At the beginning of the game put the Subway Token at the end of the line in Jamaica.  At the end of each players turn, the Subway might move.  If the subway is at a local stop (represented by a black dot) the train automatically moves to the next stop.  If the subway is at an express stop (represented by a white dot), the player whose turn just ended must roll a die.  If the die is 1-2, then the subway is being delayed by construction (or police activity…or someone holding the doors…you, know…something’s holding up the train).  If the die is 3-4, the train moves to the next local stop.  If the die is 5-6, then the train suddenly goes express and moves to the next local stop.

Once the game ends in this way points are tallied.  You get one point for every neighborhood you control, bonus points for each borough you control (equal to the unit bonus you receive at the beginning of the turn), and any points earn by playing adventure cards (points vary by adventure).