Joe Wilson replaces Obama as my personal hero for the week (last week).

I’m finally catching up on the current events of last week. Here’s the “You Lie!” clip that launched a thousand tweets:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TxHKSHvMRWE

Most people I know sent this to me because they though I would be offended that someone challenged by political hero on a platform that I think is the most important one we face as a nation.

These people were surprisingly I wholeheartedly support him and cheer him on.

I love this clip. Every time I hear the mutters, jeers, and boos which finally builds up in Joe Wilson shouting out “You Lie!”  People call Joe Wilson’s actions unacceptable, but I feel that this is exactly how politicians should behave. For decades we have been missing the booing and grumbling of the crowd in stark counterpoint to the cheers. The sound of dissent and is exactly how government should sound. We need less polite debating and more shouting matches. We don’t have enough politicians brave enough to stoop to childish name calling when a radical piece of legislature comes close to the tipping point of popular support!

What could be better than radical policy-making met with radical decent? We have the smartest people in the country in the same room; this should cause lots of shouting. We need more radical ideas that are scary enough to make half of the people in the House stand up and cheer and the other half to shout “You lie!” We don’t have nearly enough decent in our government, and that’s the problem!

Too many politicians that I admire sat quietly in their place as America drifted closer to war. Too many politicians passively gave President Bush permission to declare war. This is passivity clears them of the blame for actually declaring war, but what we needed was someone to stand up to Bush and shout “You Lie”…not one of them stood up and shouted anything. A few…a very few…voiced their concerns quietly and politely, but there should have been downright pandemonium in Congress when the decision was made. Someone, anyone, just one person should have stood up and shouted “You Lie!”

Someone should have stood up and shouted “You Lie” on September 25, 2002, when President Bush said: “They [Al Qaeda and Saddam] work in concert. The danger is, is that Al Qaeda becomes an extension of Saddam’s madness and his hatred and his capacity to extend weapons of mass destruction around the world.” someone should have stood up and shouted “You Lie”.

Someone should have stood up and shouted “You Lie” on September 28, 2002, when President Bush flatly asserted: “The Iraqi regime [...] could launch a biological or chemical attack in as little as 45 minutes after the order is given [and] this regime is seeking a nuclear bomb, and with fissile material could build one within a year.”

Someone should have stood up and shouted “You Lie” on January 28, 2003, when President Bush said: “The British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa.” someone should have stood up and shouted “You Lie”.

Do I think Obama’s health care plan is as potentially dangerous as Bush’s war? No…but this is even more reason why someone should call him on lying. I like the things that Obama says, so I’m more likely to believe them without question. Many people in this country are like that, therefore someone has to step up and call the truth of his statements into question.

I am not happy that people are standing in Obama’s way of bringing health care reform to this country…but I am glad that our government is finally galvanized and angry. I want angry people in the government. I want people to be angry enough to cook up crazy schemes like “Let’s give health care to everyone!” or “Let’s go to war with Iraq!” and then I want people angry enough at those ideas to say “Are you crazy? What’s the matter with you?!?” but it can’t get to that point until the first voice shouts out “You Lie!”

So thank you Joe Wilson, for being my hero of the week. We need someone with that courage to shout out when others just sit silently at your side.

Where has this bravery been for the last two decades?

The Journey of Styx and the Journey of Journey

It has been said about Styx, “Although they began as an artsy prog rock band, Styx would eventually transform into the virtual arena rock prototype by the late 70’s.”

It has been said about Journey, “During their initial 14 years of existence, Journey altered their musical approach and their personnel extensively while becoming a top touring and recording band.”

…and these are highly respected bands.

What’s the difference between a band transforming/altering itself and selling out?

The 2008/2009 Tiny Awards for Excelence in Theater (that I’ve seen)

It’s the beginning of another academic year, so that means I’m at my deadline for announcing the Tinies, recognizing the best theater that I’ve seen this year.  So without further ado, here are the 2008/2009 Tyne Awards for Excellence in Theater that I’ve Seen:

Best Broadway Play: The American Plan (Manhattan Theater Club)

Best Off-Broadway Play: Clay (Matt Sax)

Best Short Play: Good Night Lovin’ Trail (John Patrick Bray)

Best Theatrical Event: The Blockhead (Ripley’s Believe It or Not)

Best Musical Event: The Composer Is Dead (Lemony Snicket)

Best Actor: Matt Sax (Clay)

Best Actress: Mary Louise Parker (Heda Gabler)

Best Actor in a Short Play: Billy Fenderson (Party Girl)

Best Actress in a Short Play: Olivia Roric (Good Night Lovin’ Trail)

Best Improv Group: Phil & I (Phil Wells and J Hobart B)

Best Improv Show: Fool’s Journey (Neutrino)

Best Improv Actor: Nick Ross (Wilder)

Best Improv Actress: Beth Appel (Sharktank)

Best Direction in a Play: David Grindley (The American Plan)

Best Direction of a Short Play: Akia (Good Night Lovin’ Trail)

Best Choreography: Matt Sax (Clay)

Best Live Music: The Orchestra of St. Lukes (The Composer Is Dead)

Best Sound Design: Joshua Horvath (Clay)

Best Scenic Design: Meghan Raham (Clay)

Best Costume Design: Ann Roth (Heda Gabler)

Best Lighting Design: Jason Lyons (Clay)

Special Award for Lifetime Achievement in the Theater: Ali Reza Farahnakian (PIT)

Best Theater Group/Company: The People’s Improv Theater (PIT)

Special Award: Empire Opera (for committing to paying actors…in both respect and currency…through times of economic strife)

…as always trophies are available upon request!

Announcing the 2008/2009 Tiny Awards for Excelence in Theater

I don’t want to criticize the intelligence of communtiy college students.

…but today is the first day of class, and this is the scene at the escalators.

Next to the up escalator going to the floor above they have a large sign saying “Use this escalator to go up.”

Next to the down escalator coming down from the floor above they have a security guard posted at the bottom of this escalator to stop people from trying to go up.

…

And every time I walk by he’s very busy.

How long would it take you to notice a garbage strike in YOUR town?

In a recent visit to Toronto, nearly everyone we met was apologizing for the garbage strike.

The first thing that struck me was that it is just a slight exaggeration to say nearly everyone was apologizing. Waiters, street vendors, even random people Phil chatted up on the street all seemed embarrassed by the state of their streets. New Yorkers would never go out of their way to apologize for anything a city worker would subject a tourist to.

The second thing that struck me is that I had no idea what the hell everyone was talking about. We finally had someone point out to us the “unsightly” state of this garbage can that obviously “needed to be taken care of”.

This is the sight that made most Torontinians horribly embarrassed by the filth in their streets. When we got back I snapped a photo of our street corner on an average day:

No wonder we missed it! Some days I’d be grateful if NYC looked like Toronto in the middle of a garbage strike!

The Jesus Year: What did you achieve by the time you were thirty-three?

At the age of thirty Jesus started his ministry; three years later he saved all of humanity.  Turning thirty-three is your “Jesus Year”, and it’s a tough act to foll.  When I turned thirty I made it a plan to top Jesus in three years time.  Two years later I was no further than I was when I put myself on this quest, but finally six-months away from the deadline I achieved my goal.

Did you save anyone from eternal damnation, you might ask.

No, I did not.  That’s been done, but there’s more than one way to measure success.  I recently started working for CUNY, a city school, so I’m being paid by the mayor.  More specifically, I’m being paid by the taxpayers of New York City, of which I am one…so, basically I’m working for myself.  I’m self-employed!

…and Jesus?

Well, he worked for his dad his whole life.

Why do colleges expect you to keep paying after receiving their product?

Imagine if all companies had this expectation:

Hello, may I speak to Mr. Tyne please?  Hi, I’m Matthew and I’m in my third year of owning a Chevrolet.  I see you bought your Chevrolet ten years ago.  I hope you’ll have the chance to go to a car show this year and celebrate your car ownership!  Did you hear that the new Chevrolet is going to incorporate the Volt Powertrain technology?  How exciting is that?  Pretty exciting, I know!  Anyway, I’m calling because I’m trying to raise money for Chevrolet for several automobile programs that the cost of buying a car doesn’t cover, and I ‘m trying to help 1999 owners meet their giving goal.  Your year is trying to raise one million dollars and have 75% owner participation as a year goal.  I see that you haven’t given to Chevrolet since buying your car, and this should really be the year you decide to help out Chevrolet financially.  Even if you can’t afford to donate as much as you did when you bought your car, any donation would help you meet the 1999 Chevrolet owners’ goal.  Car and Driver magazine ranks Chevrolet with other American cars, and they believe that donating financially to your car company even after they no longer own their car is a reflection on how good our vehicals are.  You would be interested in donating towards our company?  Great.  Thank you.  Would you consider making that an annual contribution?  Chevrolet would really appreciate the support in helping us to sell cars to others.

Words that have been on my lips most often in the moth of July…

Sometimes My Little Efforts to Save the World for You Feel So Very Futile

Isaac and Rainbow are educational theater performers that I admire for putting on shows for children on a variety of subjects.  One of their shows deals with water conservation.  It was a good show and I was a little bit sad when they dropped one of the bits from their show.  They used to emphasize that it’s important to turn off the water when we’re brushing our teeth, even though it’s just two minutes the waste of water adds up.  When I asked about it, they said that they made the decision when driving around the neighborhood and every house was watering their lawns all day, every day.  It was hard to focus on such a small waste of water when she was faced with their parents’ water waste on such a grand scale.  Why spend so much time and energy saving two minutes of water out of the bathroom faucet when it would be impossible to stop the amount of water wasted by their parents to keep their lawns the perfect shade of green?

I face the same type of disparagement with air conditioning.

Mrs. TZ and I generally keep our air conditioner at an even 80 degrees.  We don’t like to use our air conditioning due to the unnecessary damage the collective use of AC does to the environment, but we just moved into an apartment directly above the boiler and sometimes the heat is just unbearable.  If we can keep it to just under 80 degrees in our apartment, we feel comfortable enough.  There’s then no need to push the air conditioner lower and adversely affecting the world.  Part of my responsibility in the apartments (I work there.) is to inspect apartments after residents move out.  I recently went inspecting a dozen apartments three days after the residents moved out, and literally each and every apartment I inspected had their air conditioner on, blasting full power, with the thermostat set to 60 degrees.  I can only imagine that since this is how they kept their apartment when no one was living there that they probably had it going full 24/7 while they were living there.

What kind of positive impact could my energy conservation have against that kind of waste?  Judge me if you will, but after I post this I’m turning down my AC to 77 degrees.

By Popular Request: The Story of the Attack of the Ferocious Vervet Monkeys

ZimmyDSH had taken me and One-Plate to a game reserve during my time in Kenya.  One-Plate had been living in Nairobi for as long as Zimmy had, but it was my first Safari.  Zimmy went in to pay our fee to drive through the park and left me and One-Plate to watch the Land Rover.  Since we were still outside the park, the online animals in sight were the vervet monkeys.  They watched Zimmy go into the ranger’s office, and as soon as he was out of sight they started to circle.

Their cuteness kept them from seeming too threatening, but as an Eagle Scout I knew to be prepared.  Number one rule with dealing with small mammals is to be wary if they get too close, but also remember that they are more afraid of you than you are of them.  This turns out not to be the case when safariing in East Africa.

The monkeys run towards us to test our resolve and then run off.  I reach through the Land Rover window to grab something to brandish at them, and find a handy water bottle.  I brandish it at them and bang it against the hood of the Land Rover to make a good, threatening “bang”.  After all, I’m not going to actually try and whack one of them in the head!

They all backed off at this gesture, but what I didn’t realize was that one had snuck around to the back, jumped up on the hood, and wanted to face off against me!

I brandish the water bottle again and he responds by grabbing it out of my hands, jumping onto the roof of the car, dropping down the sunroof, grabbing a bag of nuts, and running off to share the bounty with his friends.

I realize that we shouldn’t necessarily ascribe human feelings to animal actions, but I swear that after I had locked myself in the car and he had passed out our nuts to his friends…I swear that he was brandishing the bottle mockingly back at us.

Stupid Monkey.