Take Your Daughter to Work Day, Part 1

Sargent:  Everybody! Into the trenches! Down! Down! Keep your heads down!

Bombs continue to fall as the troops file into the foxhole.  They all gather for orders.

Sargent:  Men! Today is take your daughters to work day!  So we’ve arranged some special activities for the day to keep them—

Private A:  Sir?

Sargent: Do you have a problem Soldier?

Private A:  Sir!  No, sir!

Sargent:  Good!  As I was saying—

Private A: …but, Sarge!  Our daughters are all hundreds of miles away!

Sargent:  That is correct.  That’s why we had them shipped over here on the Red Eye.  They arrived in Baghdad at 0900 hours.  They are currently enroute to our current location by bus.

Private A: Sir, you can’t be serious!

Sargent:  Soldier, have you known me to be a joking man?

Private A; Sir!  No, sir!

Sargent:  The US Senate has declared today take your daughter to work day, and we we are going to comply!

Private C: I haven’t seen my daughter in four years.

Sargent: …and today you will!

Sound of a bomb…or perhaps a plane crash.

Sargent:  Unless that was their bus.

Awkward silence.

Sargent:  That, soldier, was a joke.

Private A:  Sir, the only reason we’re over here is to keep our family safe!

Sargent:  And you’d better keep them safe, this isn’t a picnic.  This is war!

Private B:  Exactly, sir.  I don’t think this is a good idea…

Sargent:  Private!  Are you questioning your duty to your country?

Private B: Sir! No, sir!

Sargent:  Are you ashamed for your daughter to see you at work?

Private B:  Sir! No, sir!

Sargent:  Do you want her to die out their in the desert?

Private B:  Sir! No, sir!

Sargent:  Then we have to prepare to rescue them.  Their bus is one klick away from the city wall.  It’s currently broken down on a road littered with landmines and snipers, so we’ve got to go in and get them.

Private A: Sir! Permission to speak freely, sir!

Sargent:  Granted.

Private A:  Thank you, sir. (He stands) The thing is—

A shot rings out and Private A falls to the ground.

Sargent:  Peterson?

Private C:  Sir! Yes, sir!

Sargent:  You’ll have to take on Peterson’s daughter today. 

Private C salutes.

Sargent:  Alright, everyone!  Move out!

Fade to black as they storm the desert.

This entry was posted in Politics and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Take Your Daughter to Work Day, Part 1

  1. Elizabeth says:

    Good thing you paraphrased my one line, Tyne-Zimm, or I’d have to sue you for royalties.

  2. Jason Tyne says:

    I tried to write it down as soon as possible, so I wouldn’t forget. I’m so bummed about missing two practices in a row!

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