It’s nice to see that at one things don’t change

My wife has a new rule in her third grade classroom…no more “what if”?

Generally she believes that imaginative thinking is amazingly good for third graders, but it also hinders explaining even the simplest things…like fire drills.

“What if you’re in the bathroom when the fire alarm goes off?”

“If you’re not with your class, join another class as they evacuate the building and let the teacher know so that they can send word to me.”

“What if you’re actually going to the bathroom?”

“You should stop and leave the building immediately.”

“What if you are pooping and ned to wipe?”

“Okay…no more ‘ what if’.”

Unfortunately it’s not a trait that enough teachers squelch.  The following dialogue came from a four-day training session for the latest census, an event that counts every person in the country where they reside on april 1st. The mention of this specific date opened up a floodgate of questions from fully-developed adults.

“What if my son had a party on April 1 and four of his guests were homeless?”

“You count the for friends and make a note on the form.”

“What if a house is jacked up into a trailer and moved from one location to another on april 1?”

“Then you count it at the second location.”

“What if someone’s house burns down on april 1?”

“Yeah…or what if someone dies on census day?”

“Oh I got one. What if someone claims they are a dog?”

The moderator sighed. If it had ben my wife I can picture her thinking “If they haven’t ben broken of the habit by now, they never will.”

“Just check off ‘ some other race’ and write ‘dog’ in the box next to it; people are allowed to choose whatever racial categories they want.”

The class sits there impressed.

“Any other questions, or can we beak for lunch?”

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4 Responses to It’s nice to see that at one things don’t change

  1. fleeceme says:

    Nice blog. =)

    This post truly rings a bell with me, my professional career focusing on sales (retail specifically) I have had my fair share of training classes with “adult” participants. My god, the “what if” questions people can come up with, it is amazing they ever leave the house for fear of a Wiley Coyote anvil landing on their heads.

    • Jason Tyne says:

      Thanks. Do you ever read “Utne”? This post is a combination of my wife’s experiences and an article I read there.

      • fleeceme says:

        Never can say I have. Its one of those magazines you have heard of before, but you have no idea what its about (I can’t give another example so maybe I am full of crap, LOL).

      • Jason Tyne says:

        I know what you mean. There are “those people”, so I supposed there can be “those magazines”. 🙂

        You should check it out, it’s the best of the alternative press. 😉

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